8 Feb 2012

Never Lonely

Living alone in a foreign city, far away from family and old friends, might sound sad. Many hours, many days spent in my own company. Well, I may be alone quite often, but I'm never lonely: over the years I've really come to appreciate my own company.
Sctually, I have become my own best friend. On grey days, when sadness lurks around the corner, I can lift myself up, raise my spirits with a kind word, gently embracing myself or preparing an extra nice cup of tea for the frozen soul.
And when there's joy, I am the first to fully share it with me!



6 Feb 2012

Don't Give In



Heavy head days
Restless heart
Dumb ears
Don’t give in
to heaviness

Sleepy and sad 
A little slow
Tired face
Don’t give in
to sadness

Straighten your back
Open your eyes
Bring out 
the smile
And continue...

5 Feb 2012

Rituals

It is be difficult to get rid of the garbage in our lives; bad habits, relationships that ended with pain. A ritual can be helpful, to transfer the garbage into... a rose?
The ritual does not have to be long or complicated to have this symbolic value. Do it wholeheartedly, and feel the strength of your intention. At the end you feel cleansed - and your symbol will support you when you need it.
A powder pink rose now reminds me of saying good-bye to the Old, with a smile, and fully letting it go.


4 Feb 2012

Light Therapy

Left the city, arrived in a winter fairy tale. So much light! Endless light blue sky, and white everywhere... Curtains were drawn aside, and the eyes wanted to open more and more to take it all in. Pure light therapy:  leaving all grey matters behind, spreading shining energy into every cell. I stilled the inner chatter, let myself be filled with light, and just.... stood there, smiling.
Nothing more is needed, than to be        Pablo Neruda

3 Feb 2012

Change

There are Signs. Some obvious, others more hidden; bodily signs, certain encounters, apparently stumbling over books or internet links. They seem to say: a change of path is due.  But - into what direction?
The process seems to work in two steps:
1. I become aware of the need for change, can't close my eyes anymore. That makes me open for  something new.
2. I finally understand how to proceed, in what direction I should go.
I've been in phase 1. for some time, trying to be very open, patiently (or cowardly?) awaiting signs for Where?
If I knew how to push the Sign Givers, I would definitely do it!

2 Feb 2012

Wonders in Winterland


Still snowing, and a feather light white blanket covers the dark ground. Amazing how snow miraculously turnes the grey surrounding into a *Wonderland*. I just love snow! It opens something up in me, through it’s white light and beauty, and it also awakens the child within me...
So I take little Sabina by the hand and we continue walking (she’s skipping, of course!) through the park. We marvel at the glittering ground, as if dressed up for a New Year’s party, at the icing on every branch and leaf, and we giggle at the exhilarating feeling of snow flakes melting in our faces. She throws some snow at me, laughing at the traces it leaves on my coat. Indeed, snow makes us both very happy!

1 Feb 2012

Just Do It

The Big Trip brought some issues up to the light again. Other possibilities became clear, and I was pushed to review what I am doing with and in my life. One thing became obvious: the lack of creative expression. Looking deeply into WHAT and HOW had me starting up this blog, but another craving still needs to be satisfied: the wish to form shapes, to play with colours and light. Photography is not enough, I want to interact more with my fantasy. Drawing or painting has been calling me for a long time, and I can't turn a deaf ear to it anymore.
It's not a new "calling". Having been a devoted drawer as a child, I completely dropped it when growing up, but since many years I have amassed quite a collection of pens, pencils, paper, brushes, and for Christmas '11 I got a beautiful set of water colours from my Darlings. I just never really got started. Something was holding me back.
The fact is I'm scared. It's as simple as that. I'm still stuck in comparing myself with others and in the wish for Perfection, being completely result focused and completely ignoring the joy of the process. Forgetting how freeing it is to play, to experiment, and just let yourself be amazed at what comes out via your hand(s)!
Today I made an Important Resolution: "Skip the stupid excuses, let go of the holding back, and just get started! Who cares what comes out of it, the material is wasted anyway if it's just lying around! If you don't try, make errors, and learn, you'll never create anything. Just get going. Just DO it!"